discover our independence, forge our own identities and build our own families. But then, as we
age, we often tend to “find our way back” to our siblings and become emotionally close once
again.
There’s a reason for that.
At a recent TED Talk presentation, Jeffrey Kluger, author of The Sibling Effect, explored the
profound lifelong bond between brothers and sisters. He said:
"Our parents leave us too soon. Our spouse and children come along too late. Our siblings are
the only ones who are with us for the entire ride."
In fact, no other human relationship last longer than the sibling relationship.
Kluger went on to say, "There may be no relationship that affects us more profoundly, that's
closer, finer, harder, sweeter, happier, sadder, more filled with joy or fraught with woe than
the relationship we have with our brothers and sisters. There's power in the sibling bond." (To
watch the entire TED Talk go to http://www.ted.com/talks/jeffrey_kluger_the_sibling_bond.html?
source=email#.T0v-HlC48sB.email)
The bottom line—the sibling relationship must be nurtured…particularly as we age.
In the Ohio Department of Aging article, Sibling Are Forever, Christine Price
wrote: "…researchers have shown that having brothers and sisters can significantly benefit us in
later life. Possibly because siblings share memories and a sense of family identity, people with
siblings report higher life satisfaction and lower rates of depression in old age. In times of illness
or crisis, siblings are shown to provide emotional and psychological support to each other. This
exchange of support is common between siblings who live far away as well as those who live
next door to each other."
Thanks for the memories
Siblings Are Forever went on to explain that "Our siblings share with us a lifetime worth
of memories and stories. For example, your sister may be the only other living person who
remembers that vacation to Niagara Falls when you were children, or your brother is the only
one who can remember how your grandpa used to eat your vegetables behind grandma’s back.
This shared history is priceless and becomes more valuable as we age." (The full article is located at http://ohioline.osu.edu/ss-fact/0180.html)
If you’ve got brothers or sisters of your own, chances are you’ve found yourselves chuckling
about funny moments and sentimental memories from decades ago. No one else can truly share
those formative life experiences with you.
How to honor this bond later in life
Connecting or reconnecting with brothers and sisters in the "second act" of life can be a
profoundly life-affirming thing to do—even if it isn’t always easy. After their parents passed
away, the bond between sisters Donna and Vickie grew even stronger. As an iLivediLoved
member, Donna wanted to do something to celebrate the special relationship she shares with
her sister, eight years her senior. Donna ordered an iLivediLoved professional video memoir as
a way to pay tribute to this cherished relationship in a way that will be preserved…even after
death. Donna is still alive, but we have been permitted to show a clip from her beautiful memoir
to her sister:
Another member, Anne, used the iLivediLoved gift certificate as a way to show her love to her
sis. Here’s a portion of her sentiment (which appears on our blog):
"I'm glad I found the ilivediloved site because I was looking for something new, different and
very special for my older sister's birthday. The ilivediloved gift certificate was the perfect gift!
She has really gotten into family genealogy over the past few years. As a mom of 4 grown kids
and lots of grandchildren, and with a husband and two sisters, I know she will want to leave
special thoughts and memories for each of us…My birthday is coming up in a few months; I
think (and hope) I know what my sis will get me."
Many other members use iLivediLoved's end-of-life messages as a way to ensure that their
siblings (and other family members) will always know just how special they are, and how much
they are loved. Members use personal letters, family photos and home videos in their end-
of-life messages to capture a lifetime of treasured memories with their beloved brothers and
sisters…memories that deserve to be preserved forever.
However you choose to acknowledge your special bond with your siblings, we hope you won’t
wait…it’s never too soon to share what’s in your heart.
Warmly,
Lilo
Sign up on our website and start preserving those memories today to be delivered in the future.
